Semi-Intentional Role Models

Everywhere I turn, there’s a hero. Heroes in comics and movies. Everyday heroes doing acts of valor and sacrifice. And then sometimes we’re given messages like this:

What I’m thinking of right now, though, are heroes as in role models. The people who have an effect on us, who make us change ourselves in some way.

The way I see it, there are three kinds of role models:

There are the people who genuinely inspire us, the people we want to be like. We buy their biographies, watch documentaries about them, and plaster our walls with their quotes and sometimes their faces. I think of these as intentional role models.

Then there are the unintentional role models. These are people who are around us because they’re part of our daily lives, and we don’t (usually) have much choice about: family, coworkers, classmates. We don’t always want to model our lives like them, nor do we always want to be around them, but they have some effect on us, regardless.

And then, perhaps most importantly, there are the semi-intentional role models: the people we choose to be around, but not necessarily because we want to be like them. We just like their company (or something that their company gives us).

So, are role models always people? Kind of a silly question, but actually, the answer is ‘no’, at least in my opinion. Role models can be real people or imaginary people, but also anything that has to do with people.

Wait, what?

Here’s how I’m defining ‘anything that has to do with people’: the books we read, the TV we watch, the places we go. And everything else around us.

The Prophet SAW has emphasized the importance of good company. He did it to the extent of equating a person’s religion with the religion of his friend (Abu Dawud). But when we think of good company, we need to expand our understanding of this to everything that influences us. This may or may not have been how the Prophet SAW intended to mean (Allah knows best), but surrounding ourselves with good conversations, in what we read and watch, will no doubt be helpful.

And, if we are parents, it’s our responsibility to ensure we surround our kids with the best. I’ll be the first to admit it’s a struggle! With so many choices, and such open availability, what can we do for their experience to be the best, and befitting a young Muslim mind?

I think the first step is educating ourselves about the variety of choices available. Alhamdulillah, in the past years, many Muslim creatives have stepped up to the monumental task of making content which can teach and entertain, the halal way. And they are striving for the best quality, the kind of quality our kiddos see everywhere else, so that the Islamic content doesn’t seem “watered down” or “boring”. It’s our job to support them, not just for their sake, but for the sake of our own children, and the future of the entire Ummah.

Let’s find ourselves some good role models.